We love a good diet and a good diet story and even better a diet disaster story or a ‘must do a diet’ story. Admit it, you’re stood in Sainsburys having a hugely satisfying peak at whose fat and whose thin in Closer magazine this week. The Daily Wail Kardashtastic (I am TM-ing that) side bar of shame draws your attention far more than the article on Brexit.

Why? That is a question by the way, although I probably have some idea of the answer, it’s at the start of this post and it bombards us every second of every minute of every hour of every day.

If you are over thirty eight you have to eat less than nothing and spin at least three times a week, gym the rest, to be a size 8 or below. 10 to 12 and you maybe able to have some chips or chocolate once a month. The rest of us, forget it, wine helps with that.

Having been on every diet under the sun it’s never about food, it’s about the promised land! These days that’s a sugar free, gluten free, carb free, fat free, fart free utopia where you look like Cindy Crawford, you married Tom Hardy, your kids love veg (‘ooohh mummy please make another kale smoothie’) and the mung bean farm/shop you set up with your sister and best friend after watching Gardeners World a few times is raking in around 90k a year.

This topic is not closed, we have a lot more work to do.